Peeve rant

MissSkittles

Chameleon Enthusiast
Hey chamily! While I love our community and appreciate each and every member, I do need to speak up about some of my peeves that I know I’m not alone in having. I’m doing this not to silence or alienate anyone, but to better empower all and use our resources more wisely.
#1 ”Fill this out”
The help form is a very powerful tool in helping others. However, it is sadly overused. As soon as a new member posts anything, they have the help form thrust upon them and often the only thing said is, ‘fill this out’.
Before tossing the help form around, is there anything that the op has said or shown that implies that they need help with their husbandry? How about a simple greeting and positive comment as a response? We can’t automatically assume that a new member is here for help or even needs any. Too often, just immediately throwing the help form with little to no explanation or even greeting alienates that new member and they leave and don’t return.
#2 “You are going to kill your chameleon”
Eesh! Some of the ways we’ve seen chameleon beings kept! O!M!G! Try to put yourself back in the poor newbie keeper’s shoes for a minute though. It was Bill Strand that provided me with this insight. Newb gets a cham and all the stuff chain pet store told them they need and they stumble across the forum. They proudly post their little beauty and their awesome cham kit set up and want to share their achievement with like minded people. I’ve seen it happen too often where the first response is telling them that they have everything wrong and are going to kill their chameleon slowly and painfully. Nothing kind or constructive is offered and the newb is scared away and never returns. Can we start with kindness, gentle truth and offers to help instead? These newbs love their little cham and aren’t intentionally providing bad care. Not to mention, we all started at the beginning.
#3 “You can’t care for your chameleon and need to give it away”
In some instances, this is absolutely correct. However, I’ve seen this sentiment tossed at a new member without even the slightest attempt to determine if the newb has resources and determination to make things right. We are not an elite club. Although sadly many newbs do lack the resources at their current time, can we instead try to work with them? Try to be helpful instead of automatically judging and deeming them unworthy.
Lastly, know your knowledge. None of us knows everything and there is still so much that we just don’t know. This is perfectly fine. It’s ok not to know…just keep on learning. There are some who post on things they have little clue about and others who don’t post on things they do know about. I will often reply on something that I have an idea about, but know I may be wrong. I will voice this in that post in some manner. If I am wrong, someone will correct me and I’ve learned stuff. If I’m right, I’ve also learned stuff. I’m not going to argue about why I think I’m right. That serves no purpose.
I was so very nervous when I first started responding and offering to share what little knowledge I had acquired. I tried to be very careful and make sure that I had a good grasp of what I was saying. I started by addressing only the very basics that I felt confidant enough about. If I couldn’t address all issues, I said so and either waited and sure enough, another more knowledgeable member came along and filled in my blanks or if that didn’t happen, I’d tag a member who could. If you know your basic husbandry guidelines or any part of it, don’t be afraid to offer partial feedback. If all you are confidant about is feeder choices and gutloading, provide that info and let it be know that this is all you are comfortable advising on. I guarantee before you know it, you’ll have built up some confidence and that is never a bad thing. You’ll have also helped the more knowledgeable member who comes along later to fill in the blanks.
Each and every member brings in their own unique set of skills, worth and perspective. Whether someone truly researched all things chameleon for many years before actually getting one, or impulsively bought the cute baby cham from chain pet store, we all started at the beginning. Let’s please be kind and compassionate to each other and actively contribute our strengths to making our community a positive place of celebrating, learning about and sharing our love for chameleons.
 

Mountain Dragon

Chameleon Enthusiast
#1 ”Fill this out”
The help form is a very powerful tool in helping others. However, it is sadly overused. As soon as a new member posts anything, they have the help form thrust upon them and often the only thing said is, ‘fill this out’.
Before tossing the help form around, is there anything that the op has said or shown that implies that they need help with their husbandry? How about a simple greeting and positive comment as a response? We can’t automatically assume that a new member is here for help or even needs any. Too often, just immediately throwing the help form with little to no explanation or even greeting alienates that new member and they leave and don’t return.
Just did this sorry
 

MissSkittles

Chameleon Enthusiast
Edit posted something to emotional sorry this is cf not a thing to let people know ur troubles sorry
I caught the original and I’m sorry for whatever you may be going thru.
Your voice is just as important here as everyone else’s. I can’t say anything other than what I’ve already said. Unfortunately our emotional tone doesn’t come thru written words well. I am not a mean person and it is extremely rare for me to be mean. My rant is not one of these extremely rare occasions.
I just see that we can do and be better in not alienating and scaring away new members.
 

Mountain Dragon

Chameleon Enthusiast
I caught the original and I’m sorry for whatever you may be going thru.
Your voice is just as important here as everyone else’s. I can’t say anything other than what I’ve already said. Unfortunately our emotional tone doesn’t come thru written words well. I am not a mean person and it is extremely rare for me to be mean. My rant is not one of these extremely rare occasions.
I just see that we can do and be better in not alienating and scaring away new members.
Thankyou. I know you weren’t being mean I’ve never seen you be mean I just felt bad that I did the first one yesterday
 

jamest0o0

Chameleon Enthusiast
sad donald trump GIF
 

Beman

Chameleon Enthusiast
I love this and could not agree more! There are only a few of us that are doing complete husbandry reviews.

I do not think people realize how time consuming these get. I did two yesterday and I am still doing follow up on those and a few others from last week. While I do not mind doing help forms at all, it does not mean it is the first thing we throw at everyone. There is a time and a place for them. Every person that makes a thread does not need a help form offered.

I also hate seeing the comments of "your going to kill your cham". Saying that to someone who is just excited to post somewhere with like minded people immediately closes the door for others to step in and help in a welcoming manor. They leave the forum which then does more than likely kill the cham.

I think it is also important to speak on what you know about. I see it a lot where someone will say "oh that is normal" when in fact it can also mean that something is very off. Or they will tell someone the gender of their Panther chameleon based on the fact that it does not have spurs. Well we know the issue with that. I think it is important to help where you can and leave the threads that you can not help in alone or tag in someone that can help.

This is a community where we all have to work together. I wish other more experienced keepers were more active. It would bring more to our community. When your new you want to help but you have to know your limits also. I know very well the things I do not need to give info on. I will provide links for people to learn more but I do not try to tell them how to set up bio active when I barely know about it. I speak to the species I know and leave the others for members that have the experience I don't.
 

kinyonga

Chameleon Queen
Hey chamily! While I love our community and appreciate each and every member, I do need to speak up about some of my peeves that I know I’m not alone in having. I’m doing this not to silence or alienate anyone, but to better empower all and use our resources more wisely.
#1 ”Fill this out”
The help form is a very powerful tool in helping others. However, it is sadly overused. As soon as a new member posts anything, they have the help form thrust upon them and often the only thing said is, ‘fill this out’.
Before tossing the help form around, is there anything that the op has said or shown that implies that they need help with their husbandry? How about a simple greeting and positive comment as a response? We can’t automatically assume that a new member is here for help or even needs any. Too often, just immediately throwing the help form with little to no explanation or even greeting alienates that new member and they leave and don’t return.
#2 “You are going to kill your chameleon”
Eesh! Some of the ways we’ve seen chameleon beings kept! O!M!G! Try to put yourself back in the poor newbie keeper’s shoes for a minute though. It was Bill Strand that provided me with this insight. Newb gets a cham and all the stuff chain pet store told them they need and they stumble across the forum. They proudly post their little beauty and their awesome cham kit set up and want to share their achievement with like minded people. I’ve seen it happen too often where the first response is telling them that they have everything wrong and are going to kill their chameleon slowly and painfully. Nothing kind or constructive is offered and the newb is scared away and never returns. Can we start with kindness, gentle truth and offers to help instead? These newbs love their little cham and aren’t intentionally providing bad care. Not to mention, we all started at the beginning.
#3 “You can’t care for your chameleon and need to give it away”
In some instances, this is absolutely correct. However, I’ve seen this sentiment tossed at a new member without even the slightest attempt to determine if the newb has resources and determination to make things right. We are not an elite club. Although sadly many newbs do lack the resources at their current time, can we instead try to work with them? Try to be helpful instead of automatically judging and deeming them unworthy.
Lastly, know your knowledge. None of us knows everything and there is still so much that we just don’t know. This is perfectly fine. It’s ok not to know…just keep on learning. There are some who post on things they have little clue about and others who don’t post on things they do know about. I will often reply on something that I have an idea about, but know I may be wrong. I will voice this in that post in some manner. If I am wrong, someone will correct me and I’ve learned stuff. If I’m right, I’ve also learned stuff. I’m not going to argue about why I think I’m right. That serves no purpose.
I was so very nervous when I first started responding and offering to share what little knowledge I had acquired. I tried to be very careful and make sure that I had a good grasp of what I was saying. I started by addressing only the very basics that I felt confidant enough about. If I couldn’t address all issues, I said so and either waited and sure enough, another more knowledgeable member came along and filled in my blanks or if that didn’t happen, I’d tag a member who could. If you know your basic husbandry guidelines or any part of it, don’t be afraid to offer partial feedback. If all you are confidant about is feeder choices and gutloading, provide that info and let it be know that this is all you are comfortable advising on. I guarantee before you know it, you’ll have built up some confidence and that is never a bad thing. You’ll have also helped the more knowledgeable member who comes along later to fill in the blanks.
Each and every member brings in their own unique set of skills, worth and perspective. Whether someone truly researched all things chameleon for many years before actually getting one, or impulsively bought the cute baby cham from chain pet store, we all started at the beginning. Let’s please be kind and compassionate to each other and actively contribute our strengths to making our community a positive place of celebrating, learning about and sharing our love for chameleons.


Great post @MissSkittles !!!!! I know I've been guilty sometimes of asking for the questions to be answered.
 
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