hey, I don't have a cham, but after browsing and posting on these forums for a bit and researching for like ever, I think that you have actually listed everything that a chameleon isn't.
i.e. Chameleons, as a rule, aren't friendly and don't like being handled, but on the other hand some are more friendly than others, (panthers / veilds) (i think)
Also from my own reaserch into chameleons, the more redily available and "friendliest" chameleons appear to be larger in size.
Also as far as I know, all chameleons are fairly fussy eaters, but again some more than others.
as For caging size that again depends on the size of your chameleon.
the only thing I could reccomend from reseaech is a Carpet Chameleon.
These guys are nice and small, therefore smaller cage size They are completely beautiful, in my opinion they have colouring to rival a panthers, they don't live very long, 3 years but as for handling, lllreptile says they can be quite tame but there is very little information about them out there. The only thing I know is that many6 orf the specimins are wild caught, steer clear of this, always get captive bred.
I hope this helps, here is a rough care guide
http://lllreptile.com/info/library/animal-care-sheets/chameleons/-/carpet-chameleon/
here is another more indepth care guide and species info.
There are also some pretty nice pics at the bottom.
http://www.adcham.com/html/taxonomy/species/flateralis.html
Cheers, Noah