Patrick.1974
Member
I should start this off by saying a 43 year old and father of 3, two of my kids are adults. I have two adult Veiled Chameleons who bred. The first clutch -about 32 eggs- had 16 babies hatch, of which I lost 11 due to a variety of reasons, A few never opened their eyes and didn’t live more than two weeks.
Out of the five that did make it, 4 were females and one was male (baby boy) Baby Boy and one of his sisters (Polly) had one month of health issues- neither of them opened their eyes or ate without being forced. As a result they stayed small while their sisters grew up around him.
Surprisingly I got them better both of them started opening their eyes and eating on their own. When Oscar (the father) got sick, I was happy to at least have baby boy replace him if Oscar passed on.
Baby Boy are from my hand, and lived the sum room with the hibiscus tree that he would bask in as I misted him.
This is the part where my heart breaks into 1000 pieces...
I have two trees in my sun room, about 10 feet apart- last week I was cleaning cages and put baby boy in one tree and his big sister Cami in the other. After cleaning the cages I went to put Cami back in her tree, only I couldn’t find her- I looked at the screens- sometimes they can get to them and climb all the way to the top (which is almost 12 feet above the ground).
I looked up at the screen above baby boys tree and found Cami attacking him viciously- I grabbed her and saw she had him in her mouth - she let him go and I quick grabbed him, when I looked at him I knew he was hurt badly- his lower jaw looked dislocated, and one of his eyes was already shut and the other was barely open- his tiny back feet gripped my finger tighter then they ever had before, then he slowly faded- his eye looking right at me until it closed, his tail went limp- and within a matter of minutes he was gone.
I didn’t cry at my grandfathers funeral, I didn’t cry when one of my best friends died in a construction accident, or when I found out my high school girlfriend had died suddenly.
When Vaby Boy died in my hand, I cried like a baby- balled actually- I couldn’t wrap my head around it, I blamed myself for being naive, I wanted to hate Cami- but I couldn’t, but it’s hard to look at her now without picturing what she did and the hole it put in me.
I can’t explain it without saying I feel like some part of me died- there is a hole there- every morning he went into his tree after eating from my hand- he was part of my morning routine to the point I checked out on all the others.
To lose him, and in that way- as I saw it, Cami had actually hunted him down with the intent to kill him.
It was brutal and nonsensical and I can’t get over it.
When I am alone I cry about it, when I see the sunroom I feel tears filling my eyes, if I start to try to move on I get depressed.
I told my wife that I know it seems silly- but it broke my heart- there is a hole that I can’t fill, I need to move on, I need to- but god is it hard.
I never thought that losing a baby chameleon would be the event that would break a 20 year streak of not crying- I miss him so much, it’s like I lost a child - I am tearing up just writing about it, no one understands and I can’t explain it.
A part of me is gone, the only male that survived in the clutch, the sweet heart who fought his way back from the brink and got healthy again- is gone forever.
I wish I could go back in time and not ever put Cami out in the sunroom, I wish I could go out and see him sleeping in the branches of the hibiscus tree, not buried in the soil beneath it.
I had hoped writing this would make me feel better - it really hasn’t. I can only tell others not to do what I did, don’t leave them out of their cages and out of your sight- think of them like toddlers, I wish I had...
Out of the five that did make it, 4 were females and one was male (baby boy) Baby Boy and one of his sisters (Polly) had one month of health issues- neither of them opened their eyes or ate without being forced. As a result they stayed small while their sisters grew up around him.
Surprisingly I got them better both of them started opening their eyes and eating on their own. When Oscar (the father) got sick, I was happy to at least have baby boy replace him if Oscar passed on.
Baby Boy are from my hand, and lived the sum room with the hibiscus tree that he would bask in as I misted him.
This is the part where my heart breaks into 1000 pieces...
I have two trees in my sun room, about 10 feet apart- last week I was cleaning cages and put baby boy in one tree and his big sister Cami in the other. After cleaning the cages I went to put Cami back in her tree, only I couldn’t find her- I looked at the screens- sometimes they can get to them and climb all the way to the top (which is almost 12 feet above the ground).
I looked up at the screen above baby boys tree and found Cami attacking him viciously- I grabbed her and saw she had him in her mouth - she let him go and I quick grabbed him, when I looked at him I knew he was hurt badly- his lower jaw looked dislocated, and one of his eyes was already shut and the other was barely open- his tiny back feet gripped my finger tighter then they ever had before, then he slowly faded- his eye looking right at me until it closed, his tail went limp- and within a matter of minutes he was gone.
I didn’t cry at my grandfathers funeral, I didn’t cry when one of my best friends died in a construction accident, or when I found out my high school girlfriend had died suddenly.
When Vaby Boy died in my hand, I cried like a baby- balled actually- I couldn’t wrap my head around it, I blamed myself for being naive, I wanted to hate Cami- but I couldn’t, but it’s hard to look at her now without picturing what she did and the hole it put in me.
I can’t explain it without saying I feel like some part of me died- there is a hole there- every morning he went into his tree after eating from my hand- he was part of my morning routine to the point I checked out on all the others.
To lose him, and in that way- as I saw it, Cami had actually hunted him down with the intent to kill him.
It was brutal and nonsensical and I can’t get over it.
When I am alone I cry about it, when I see the sunroom I feel tears filling my eyes, if I start to try to move on I get depressed.
I told my wife that I know it seems silly- but it broke my heart- there is a hole that I can’t fill, I need to move on, I need to- but god is it hard.
I never thought that losing a baby chameleon would be the event that would break a 20 year streak of not crying- I miss him so much, it’s like I lost a child - I am tearing up just writing about it, no one understands and I can’t explain it.
A part of me is gone, the only male that survived in the clutch, the sweet heart who fought his way back from the brink and got healthy again- is gone forever.
I wish I could go back in time and not ever put Cami out in the sunroom, I wish I could go out and see him sleeping in the branches of the hibiscus tree, not buried in the soil beneath it.
I had hoped writing this would make me feel better - it really hasn’t. I can only tell others not to do what I did, don’t leave them out of their cages and out of your sight- think of them like toddlers, I wish I had...
