I had a large oustaleti male that never ever got used to me. He bit me, and didn't let go. It was nuts. It never became docile. But that was a WC. Some chams just do not warm up to people.
One thing other people have recommended is getting gardening/leather gloves if you must pick him up/move...
They care the least about the dubia? Not the green bananas? Those things are so tiny, I don't know why they would even be interested in those. Plus they can fly and they're fast. I hate them so much.
This is why your male was chewing on the leaves. He's mineral-deficient (ie. salts). Distilled water is not for consumption, except in minute amounts for certain chemical mixtures/medicines, etc. If you want to use softer water so the misting apparatus doesn't leave a calcium/lime residue, use...
What do you think everyone else is doing? High shipping? $10-$15 isn't high, it's what it costs. Buy a couple hundred roaches, set some aside to breed, and feed off the rest. Dubia, red runners, and lobsters. If you keep your eyes peeled lobsters and red runners can be had for 1000/$35-$50 shipped.
I like the open area at the top, especially for feeding. But don't be afraid to crowd the middle of it with more foliage. They'll enjoy the cover. The biggest thing is the option for them to choose.
Post pics. I don't believe you lol. One of the ones he posted was about as big as his forearm, and I'd only seen Oustaleti get that big, NOT veileds. That thing is obscenely large.